Have you ever taken a look at yourself and thought, “Girl, you’re so messed up, I can barely stand you?”
I’m not talking about staring down a mirror and lamenting the shape of your nose or the crow’s feet perched beside your eyes.
I’m referring to moments when you simply don’t like yourself.
The times when you feel awkward, inadequate, friendless and unwanted. The days when your best efforts reel in disappointment instead of accolades. Moments when your actions beget disapproval and your voice crawls timid down your throbbing throat.
Perhaps the bitter feelings toward yourself surfaced after you made a mistake. Maybe you found yourself stirring a pot when you only intended to sprinkle in some seeds of goodwill. I experienced a moment like that just a few hours ago, and while I likely won’t even remember the incident several months from now, in that instance it was enough to resurrect a part of myself I’d rather stay dormant.
Or maybe the cause of self-disenchantment hides deep within your core. Instead of feeling like you’ve made a mistake, you might feel like you are a mistake. I’ve been there before.
Another possible cause of disliking yourself could stem from emotional trauma … the kind inflicted by others … or as in my case from five years ago … your own body.
For many of the battles I fought during my life, I found my most formidable opponent to be myself:
Each time I owned an error I didn’t make, I delivered a quick jab to my left
When dredged up past guilt, I landed a hook punch to my jaw
And, whenever I believed a lie about my self-worth, I dealt a severe uppercut that sent me wobbling to the floor
Time and time again I go to that miserable place where
I slap on a label that reads “misfit” instead of proudly displaying the one emblazoned with”beloved.”
Last week I received a gift in the mail from my dear friend, Lisa Leonard that reminded me of a truth that I too often forget. Even though the present was not a surprise, tears stung my eyes when I opened the package to find the beautiful necklace (pictured above) from Lisa’s Faith Collection. The words “wonderfully made” stamped on silver tell me who I am. They remind me that the mishaps that do come from my own judgement errors, pale in comparison to the mistake of digging out that tattered veil of rejection and placing it atop my head.
They tell me that I’m God’s child. That I am beautiful, wanted … adored. They tell me that I wield purpose.
One reason why I share such personal anecdotes on my blog is because I know I’m not alone. I know that many of the experiences and feelings that are etched into my life are shared by others. I know that when I bring light to my own issues, I can help others feel less alienated and more whole.
And that is why I’d like to give one of my readers a chance to win a $50 gift certificate from DaySpring to be used to purchase something from Lisa’s collection and perhaps a few other of your favorite things. All of Lisa’s creations in the Faith Collection are stamps with words of hope and encouragement such as: By Grace Alone; Daily Grow in Grace; Be Still and Know; He Call the Stars by Name; and many more.
How can you win this Lisa Leonard goodness? That’s the easy part. Just leave a comment below stating something that you LIKE about yourself. Something from the Creator that was woven into your being. That’s it. The contest will be open until 8:00 p.m. EST on Thursday December 6, so the winner will have time to take advantage of the DaySpring jewelry sale that ends December 9. Also, you get an extra entry for tweeting this post and one for sharing this post on your Facebook page. Just leave an extra comment telling me you shared and you’ll be entered twice … or three times!
Even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.