When I know I am going to have my picture taken for my blog, I look like this.
I have to tell you up front that I’m rather average. And on most days, I’m okay with that fact.
I’m the short girl who blends into the crowd … not glamorous … not boisterous … just there. Let me put it this way, I am the “solid” best friend or older sister that you see (but may not remember) in every romantic comedy.
I’m the girl who smiles wide, talks too fast, loses her train of thought mid-sentence and plants flowers that she forgets to water. I’m the girl who would invite you over for coffee and cupcakes, throw a pile of clutter into a closet five-minutes before you arrive; and then greet you at the door sporting messy hair and mismatched socks.
I’m the girl who tries so darn hard … but messes up anyway … and often.
I’m the girl who once believed that she was just a mistake made by two teenagers more than three decades ago. The girl who hated what her mirror reflected. The girl who accepted lies as truth and wore an invisible < on her shirt. It evokes no wonder that I also was the fairy-princess of the masquerade ball … the composed one with a fake smile.
When I am having a good hair and make up day, I go to work looking like this.
About five years ago, while pregnant with my son and shackled by anxiety and despair that comes with a perinatal mood disorder, I began the journey of becoming … of learning about who I am in the eyes of Jesus.
Through God’s grace, I became the girl who scrubbed off (and who has to continually scrub off) lies. I became the girl who wept honest tears the first time the words written in Psalm 139 truly penetrated her heart. I became the girl whose toes burned and legs shook as she accepted that she was womb-woven and wonderfully by the one who does not … who cannot … make mistakes.
Keeping it real ... first thing in the morning, I look like this.
And that’s why I write. I write to share where I was, where I am and where I am going. I write to tell other women that they are precious … beautiful … chosen … wanted … and needed. I write because I still mess up everyday. I write because I still struggle and by sharing those struggles I can count on my readers to do two things: 1) hold me accountable and 2) understand that they are not alone as they struggle.
Life, even with Jesus, is hard. And life, especially with Jesus, is unfathomably beautiful. I hope to keep my blog a real and safe place to share the pain, the loveliness and the average experiences that we all encounter.
What a beautiful story of transformation. Yes, we are so lovingly knit together. We are made in the image of Christ. Thank you for sharing!
Hi Angela,
Just wanted to say that your post about why you transitioned from Becoming Me to Womb Woven really blessed me. Thank you.
I just read your post on Incourage. Thank you. I blew up at my 7 year old this past Saturday. I too was reduce to tears and my sweet daughter without a moments hesitation gave me forgiveness. I have prayed and talked to God about my actions, but have yet to ask Him to forgive me. As you know this removes the shackles that bind us to all our sins and holds us down from moving through our mistakes. Blessings to you and yours.
I found you on incourage today and am excited to start following your blog. Your bio is one that hits home. My husband and I have been married for a year now and this past year has shown me so many lies that I have believed about myself my entire life and so many hurts that I have been able to cover up each day. With a patient husband at my side, I am now on a journey of learning to see myself as Jesus does and learning to rejoice in the fact the He dances over me with gladness.
Hi Angela. I just came across your post on in(courage) today, and your name sounded so familiar. Are you a Houghton grad? I was in the alumni office until February and think I know your name from there.
I’m so glad to come across your blog, as I have recently been finding inspirational blogs – Emily Freeman’s Chatting at the Sky, (in)courage – and I would love to add yours to my list to follow!
Have a wonderful day!
Praise God for a real and beautiful girl – a daughter of my Daddy God – my sister in Christ!
Hi Angela, I am Tania from Aus and I am looking forward to reading your posts. Thank you for being “real” what a blessing you must be to so many. Praise God for the wonderful vessel of light you are for His glory.
Keep shining for Him. x
Hi Angela, I came across your blog after your recent post on in-courage, and have had you on my heart this week as I was preparing a message about reaching the other side of our storms. I really get the sense that God is protecting and preparing you for something you can’t quite realise at this point, but it is going to be great! Tried to find an email on your site to send this through to you privately but couldn’t see one so hope you don’t mind me posting this
He will pray you through this and reveal Himself to you in this time. Blessings x
I love your honesty.
I just read your post on Incourage on love. Wow, that was beautiful and you put so much thought into it. I’ve been married almost 14 years and I would have loved to have had that when I was first married, but it still holds true today. You are an incredibly gifted writer, thanks for sharing
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I just love it. Genuineness is always beautifully drawing. Blessings on you, sister.