Pumpkindoodle has been VBS hopping. After our church’s Vacation Bible School ended, my social girl begged me to find her “new” Bible schools. Last week, she attended a VBS program at a church located in the historic section of our small city. The program was fantastic and I beamed at the sight of the elated smile worn by my four-year-old each day that I picked her up from class.
Yesterday, instead of attending our church, I seated myself in the sanctuary of the latest VBS host church, and watched my daughter sing with her new friends.
Our home church is casual in regard to dress and style. I knew in advance that this sweet church leaned more on the traditional and fancy side. I’ll admit I devoted more time than usual to my morning routine. And, I made sure that the nails on my toes and fingers were coated with shiny polish. Not only did I look extra snazzy, I managed to get myself and two kids out the door on time. I felt good in an “I am Mommy, hear me roar,” sort of way.
Soon after finding my seat, I dropped the pager issued by the nursery team in case Pickle needed my attention. As I bent down to pick it up, I purposefully bit the inside of my cheeks to prevent an outburst of laughter. In my hurry to get to the service in time, I unknowingly slipped on a pair of old brown sandals instead of the cute black wedges I had planned to wear. Had my dress been brown instead of black and white, this would not have been such a fashion blunder.
If this had happened a year ago, I would have stifled tears instead of a giggle. I would have mentally chastised myself for not being more careful. Anger at appearing unkempt and imperfect would have distracted me. But on this day I smiled and silently said, “This is a test, isn’t it Lord? Trust me, I get it. This is so not about me. It’s all about you. This day and every day, It’s all you God.”
I no longer need to appear as though I am completely together to feel secure. My identity is not in how well I dress, parent, clean my bathrooms, or love my husband. Please do not misunderstand me. I still strive to do these things to the very best of my ability, but I no longer grade my worthiness by my achievements and failures. I’ve learned that an invaluable part of striving for excellence is, ironically, accepting that sometimes my good enough is good enough. And that an honest, “I did my best,” is pleasing to God’s ears, while a haughty, “Aren’t I just the best?” disappoints my Savior.
God does not care if my shoes do not match my dress. But, He does care if the knowledge of my heart does not match the truth in His word. And now, more than anything else, so do I. So do I.
So think clearly and exercise self-control. Look forward to the gracious salvation that will come to you when Jesus Christ is revealed to the world. So you must live as God’s obedient children. Don’t slip back into your old ways of living to satisfy your own desires. You didn’t know any better then. But now you must be holy in everything you do, just as God who chose you is holy. 1 Peter 1:13-15 New Living Translation.