>Onward to Becoming-Part 1

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Confession…I’m complicated. Wait, you don’t need to tell me…you are complicated as well. If you are a male reading this and thinking that I’m only addressing women…sorry, you are complicated too. Most men don’t like to admit to that, but the truth is that we human beings are multidimensional…creatures layered with dreams and inhibitions, misinformation and truth, acceptance and rejection, insecurities and talents, health and scars… even a few gaping wounds. Yes indeed, we are all complicated to the core.

I’m coated with contradictions. I strive for tranquility, yet exude intense energy. Clutter limits my productivity, yet I’m often undisciplined. I’m a peacemaker, yet find myself erupting in anger. I desire to cloak my family in love, yet all too often I am cool and distant. I could list more…so many more internal conflicts…but I’m going to try something new, something positive.

Focusing first on love, I am going to try an exercise I found in the book Confessions of an Irritable Mother. The author, Karen Hossink, recommends writing down spiritual goals as if they have already happened. Karen’s goals revolved around the fruits of the spirit.

Since the Lord has been speaking to my heart about how to better love my family, the inspirations for my goals come from 1 Cor. 13:4-8.

Long blog posts are not popular, so I will list five today and the rest tomorrow.

Love is Patient I persevere through daily struggles without grumbling, complaining, and hastily snapping out of frustration.

Love is Kind – I speak to my husband and children in a gentle manner, considering their feelings before reacting.

Love does not Envy – I do not try to make my husband or children become like anyone else’s and instead love them for who they are, not for who I want them to become. And, I refuse to live in the shadow of the “mom who has it all” and instead will live in the light that illuminates my blessings.

Love does not Boast – I acknowledge that every positive accomplishment that comes from my hands is possible only because Christ lives in me.

Love is not Proud – I apologize when I wrong my husband and children and ask their forgiveness.

Another confession—I’m trembling a bit. Those five aforementioned goals seem a little lofty considering my recent failings. In fact, if I were relying on my own strength, I’d erase this post pronto. But I’m not working on my time-line or with anything I’ve got…I’m relying on Jesus…and that means the above and the ones to come can be my reality.

Karen didn’t just write her goals down once…she rewrote them daily until they became a reality…and because repetition works for me too, I am going to try to do the same…anyone want to keep me accountable? If so, there’s a link to my e-mail in the header—you have my permission to e-mail me daily if you feel led to do so.

28 thoughts on “>Onward to Becoming-Part 1

  1. >Great idea–especially after the evening I had with my 3 year old!I have done this before, with a different sort of goal (“I am a writer”). I don’t know why I hadn’t thought of doing it with spiritual/mothering goals. Thanks for the thought.

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  2. >I always laugh to myself when you and I seem to be in synch again. 🙂 I was in this same passage of scripture this morning because of my failings in loving my family. Thanks for this post! And thanks for telling us about this book. I am definitely going to have to look for it!Blessings!K

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  3. >This is great, Angela, and I feel we must have been separated at birth re: our failings. But I love the positive, Lord-anticipating attitude. A long time ago, I went up for an alter call and prayed for my non-walking-with-God husband with a couple of elders. This elder and his wife were characters! Charismatic characters who finished each other’s prayers and hallelujah-amen! They told me the exact same thing that Karen describes: act as if your husband’s salvation is already a given. Pray for him and treat him as if he’s a believer. I thought it was strange, and I haven’t always been one to stick with their advice. But, when you think of it, anticipating the Lord’s work in our lives is such a very godly thing to do.Blessings to you.

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  4. >Great idea! I’ve been focusing on love as well, going through one characteristic at a time. Through the Lord you can make permanent changes. You know He will help you in your persuit to be more like Christ. What a great journey to begin! I can’t wait to hear how it goes. Don’t forget that your brothers and sisters in Christ will gladly “listen” to your failures as well as successes if you want us to.

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  5. >This a wonderful. I have spent the last 11 years of motherhood doing a good job. Some of my shortcomings have weighed on me. Not that I think I will ever be perfect but knowing that there are things I can and should improve upon. I have prayed that God make me the mother I was meant to be and he is answering that prayer everyday. Something that I have been doing for myself is repeating this mantra, “I am soft, I am kind, I am strong.” This is the mother I want to be. I love what you have done as well. Making ourselves conscious of our goals gets us where we want to be. I may have to adopt your method as well. Thank you for being another vehicle for learning!

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  6. >These goals are so beautiful. Thank you for sharing your heart. Visiting your blog today has reminded me again that it is not me who will accomplish my goals, but Jesus!!I just need to step aside!

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  7. >I like this. Act as if it has already happened. I’ve been doing this a bit lately, reminding myself “I am patient.” This one is going to take some thought. What are the spiritual goals that are the top priority in my life right now.

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  8. >We all have failings. God is so patient as He works in our hearts. This is a wonderful idea and one that I am sure can help all of us as we journey through life.Beautifully written, as usual.

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  9. >Angela, what a wonderful idea. I need to do that too. “Writing it down every day till it is a reality” sounds like the way to go. Thanks for the inspiration and encouragement today. Blessings.

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  10. >Love, Love, Love this post!Oh aren’t we all complicated!AMEN!Oh the death of self and flesh – thank God Christ had victory over that so that we too can lay it down at His feet and work out our salvation through the transformative power of Christ living in us! You are a beautiful writer!Thanks for sharing so honestly!Blessings,Jill

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  11. >I am learning to do something like this, but with a different spin in my Establishing God’s Peace class. For things I fail at, or feel like a failure at, I write down those things in my prayer journal. Then corresponding on the opposite side of the page I write down the verses God provides about his character or promises–relevant to my failing. The goal is to pray over these things and recognize the truth of who God is and how He is to be reflected out of me and how it is not my work, but him working in me.

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